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I have been writing a bit of poetry lately, thinking I'll just add it to Speculativity, my little book of poetry at, when I have a new little body of it. Day before yesterday I put down something that had flown into my head whilst walking the dog. I am not depressed, by the way. I'm not contemplating anything, other than life: I am as hopeful and as positive in my feelings for my family, my friends, and myself as I have ever been, and anyone who knows me knows that I persist in being optimistic to a fault. But this poem grew legs along with my own as I stretched them alongside the clicking of MacGuyver's claws on the pavement in the silence of the winter afternoon. It's a short one so I'll share it here.

Last night I died.
Alone I walked up a steep road
I had never seen before,
All light behind, none ahead.
There were no gates,
Pearly or otherwise.
No one waited.
No angels sang.
I am dead.

Last night my older brother Ed called and told me that our brother Bill had been killed in a motorcycle accident. I have a lot to say about that, but I'll say it to my own conscience rather than air it publicly. I do encourage you to hold on to those who are dear to you and to show them as often as possible that you love them. That's what matters.

Bill was on the right in this picture, in the "Men Will Be Men" tee-shirt. My dear older brother Ed is in the middle:


Anonymous said…
Please know that I am here if you need me. Your friendship has been a blessing in my life and my heart aches for you with the passing of your brother. If you or your family need anything, please don't hesitate to ask. Your spirit is so bright and your optimism is inspirational. I know these qualities will see you through this difficult period.
Thinking of you,
runfro said…

The prayers of my family are with you an yours. If I can do anything for you please let me.

Janice Cartier said…
Dear Scott,
I am so sad to hear this. And I am so glad I got to see Bill this summer at Gail and Lynn Fuson's and get a hug from my " first boyfriend" again. The impishness in his eyes was unmistakably still there. I cherish the time we spent together that evening after so many years. I'm send my prayers to you and your family.along wiht many others I am sure. Truly saddened by news of his death. He was a very special guy.
Scott said…
Thank you all. Doug, my prayers to yours as well. It certainly is a week for loss. Stay safe in San Francisco.
Billy Kirsch said…
Scott, a beautiful poem, very moving. Once again, our thoughts are with you, very very tough.
Ed said…
I guess I'll be seeing you soon.

By the way, Bill died on my birthday.

I'll miss him.

Scott said…
Ed, I'll see you there. Still waiting on your dad's call to see when I'm flying in. It'll be good to see you, though I'd rather it happen under better circumstances. I'll miss him too.

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